Date: Tue, 6 Apr 2004

Subject: Xiaoxue's email about Tianpei's last days


My husband Tianpei went to be with the Lord  yesterday (Sat 3/27) around 1 pm in St Mary's Hospice unit. I was by his  side until his last breath and after... 

I didn't expect that he left us so quick and sudden.  One thing I feel comforting is that he passed away  very peacefully...

Friday evening, Joseph, Andrew and I went to see Tianpei in the Hospice unit. Tianpei was awake and  asked Joseph and I to help him move from bed to a  chair. While he was sitting in the chair, Joseph and  I kneed before him and each held his hand prayed for peace and rest for him. Later in the night, the night  shift nurse gave him twice Morffine and when she helped Tianpei to turn, she saw Tianpei was smiling. She  described to me it was a beautiful, beautiful smile.

From Saturday early morning, I noticed Tianpei's  lips  and mouth were so dry and his gum was bleeding. He  could not answer me and seemed sleeping all the  time.  So I started giving him warm RO water plus VB12  through sponges rubbing and cleaning his teeth and  gum, and a suringe to give more water into his  mouth.  At the same time, I played a soft music CD of Hymns  for him and singing those Hymns to him...

One hour before his real passing, Tianpei was pushed to the death door when a nurse came to give Tianpei a dry bath. I helped to undress him and rubbing water with baby shampoo on Tianpei's almost naked body. Then I noticed his breathing became heavier and heavier and his hands and feet were cold. I asked the nurse to give Tianpei oxygen at once and covered him with blanket and started to give him RO water plus VB12 through sponges and suringe. I kept singing the Hymn  ALL THE WAY MY SAVIOR LEADS ME to him in tears and telling  Tianpei I love him and my promises to him for our two children and more... then slowly Tianpei's breath became easier and smoother...then he swallowed the water accummulated in his mouth. Then the head nurse by his bed side told me Tianpei was back to life and should be OK for a while. Then we both noticed tears hanging near his eyes. He must have heard me and felt loved or relieved or saying good-bye to me...

Then a brother from the Olive fellowship came to  watch Tianpei for me while I went to lunch. I asked him  giving water to Tianpei all the time until I return from lunch. About 20 minutes later, I went back to  Tianpei's bed side and found his breathing once again became heavier and heavier. I just kept giving him water on his lips and his gum by sponge while singing the Hymn and repeating my love/promises to him, telling him God will take good care of him, me, Joseph and Andrew; he will see from above how his children grow up; and promise him I'll put all my heart to raise our children walking on God's righteous path and honor their father and mother... this time Tianpei  didn't return. I could feel life was slipping away with his each breath more and more gentle. Finally he stopped breathing. He passed away very peacefully. No sign of pain, no wrinkles, no frowning on his face, but perfect peace. He looked much younger to me. His skin became so smooth...

We have walked a long way fighting cancer. We have tried our best. We have joined our hearts together to fight the battle to the finish.

Tianpei is now free of cancer. Thank the Lord our God for all your prayers, support, help and love towards us. We're not alone in this battle because you are behind us and selflessly support us in many ways. May God richly bless you all.

Love in Christ,
Xiaoxue